I think strongly we should, actually. In any case, suggestions welcomed!
Open source is hard, but I think hard is OK. Disrespect on the other hand is not a weapon to wield bluntly
6 Likes
Why treat someone with respect when they aren’t treating you with respect? There are lots of ways to be disrespectful, sometimes it’s hard to tell but when I see it I won’t tolerate it. If I do I’m rewarding and encouraging it and not respecting myself.
Everything works better between humans when, even if we’re having problems with someone, we interact with mutual respect. If one breaks that it falls apart IME so I just stop interacting.
7 Likes
I think being courteous is the go. Whether you respect them or not - unless you are trolling them for whatever reason - but trolling is ridiculous in this sort of scenario - unless maybe trying to derail the devs.
IMO, if you can’t block it, then just remember that their bad behavior is a reflection of them and not you, so just ignore the negative bits and keep moving forward.
7 Likes
I have found that respect is not just something people inherently/instinctually know, but first are taught it by either their parents or life experience teaching them.
Depending on ones upbringing they may not have learnt the skill of respect. For instance self centred people often were not taught the skill of respect and remain at the young child stage of respect. Also certain mental conditions allow one to be fully functional but ignorant of how to properly treat others with respect.
As @happybeing points out we should be showing respect to others until they show they should not be. In his example when they are disrespectful.
Fortunately I have seen that most have been taught respect from an early age and they give respect when appropriate. And some who have been taught but for one reason or another choose to not give it. For instance at the first sign of criticism.
Also I was also taught that when a person has put in the hard yards, be it years of education, work/life experience, helping others, even outstanding endeavours and so on you show respect for that. Also when you meet someone you show respect for them and more so for elders.
[EDIT] Even with disagreements on how one approaches a problem, or feel things are off course, these are not issues of respect, they are simply disagreements. To express disagreements on the progress or direction of dealing with an issue in terms of respect shows a real misunderstand of what respect is. For instance I can totally disagree with someones analysis, or how discussions are had and it does not change my respect for these people. Only if they show they did not deserve respect by say lying/deceit/attitudes would that be a reason to alter my respect for the person. The disagreements is not a reason.
3 Likes
Tough one for me this. I think there is a big difference between respect and courtesy. Everyone should always be courteous to each other unless given reason not to. Respect for me is earned by my own personal interactions with a person. I can respect someone’s achievements without respecting them as a person.
This team always show courtesy to individuals even in the most heated of discussions. Like @happybeing said when this courtesy is not reciprocated the team has every right to totally disengage with this person.
3 Likes
There are two main meanings to respect. One based on feeling admiration, the other acting with regard to the other’s feelings (what we’re talking about here I believe) which is where courtesy belongs IMO, but not only courtesy.
In this context I agree courtesy is the focus, you can be straightforward, blunt even, without being dismissive, demanding, belittling etc.
8 Likes
100%.
I’ve no time for anyone who can’t control themselves and show a modicum of courtesy/respect for those they’re interacting with.
Doesn’t feel like a whole lot to ask for to me.
11 Likes
Sarcasm has never been well adapted to Internet, from the beginning…
Let’s behave genuinely and positively
8 Likes
In philosophy and rhetoric, the principle of charity or charitable interpretation requires interpreting a speaker’s statements in the most rational way possible and, in the case of any argument, considering its best, strongest possible interpretation.
and that is constructive. That is how progress is achieving, by drawing out the differences and looking to resolve and bridge any gaps. In part that is about recognizing common interests.
The opposite then is seeking out the worst interpretation; creating vortexes that risk time sinks or just acting as a drag down; always noting the negative, is not constructive… and suggests dissonance in the underlying interest and reason for engaging.
and obviously there is a range where the extremes are rare… and defaults to negative interpretation can and should be called out.
Indulge the positive and discourage the negative…
Respect has different meanings but as a base expectation that social interactions should have regard for others - that is fair. Similar to the principal of charity, in not allowing the imposing of negatives.
All conflict boils down to a dislike of imposing of stupidities on others - conceit; selfishness; greed; arrogance; and bigotry are the hallmarks of evils… and they all have one thing in common - a disregard for others.
You can tell a lot about people the way they value others.
Be kind to others where you can…
4 Likes
I see what you did there 
7 Likes
I think @scottefc86 described problem with respect correctly.
What English Wikipedia says? “is a positive feeling or action”. So what exactly? Feeling or action? Correct term should not have several meanings.
Another Wikipedia says slightly different thing: “the subjective position of one person in relation to another”. And that is how I use term “respect”.
It can’t be “taught” as @neo said, it’s a different concept.
What @davidpbrown said looks completely unrelated. Negative interpretation is when person says “I mean X”, but other person says “No you’re lying, you mean Y instead”. I don’t even remember such situations here, whether on forum or on GitHub.
As for showing slightly more respect than person deserve - I think it’s a good thing overall. It helps with mistakes (when your understanding of person’s actions is flawed) and smoothes random events like bad mood. However, requiring specific kinds of “actions” brings several problems: 1. if actions and thoughts deviates too much, it start to look more and more like lie (this is what I said in #2063, maybe “lie” is not the best term, maybe someone knows better one) 2. It is very hard to make criteria which differentiate “bad” actions and “good” actions. It means that classification will be either wrong or too subjective (with subjective being treated as arbitrariness by some people).
1 Like
Several of the replies above have agreed that courtesy is what is meant by respect in this context.
1 Like
Another interesting question to think about:
Should courtesy requirement apply just to developers/community, or also to every other person, living or dead?
2 Likes
It’s a matter of whether the other person is willing to engage with someone who doesn’t show it. It’s up to them and I think you shouldn’t expect people to engage with you if you don’t listen to them. Some will, but many won’t because it’s a reasonable expectation shared by many people.
On social media being rude to me or argumentative gets a block. Why should I give my attention to people who do that?
Here I’m more forgiving than on social media, so it depends on context and a degree of personal choice.
A friend I would cut slack to find out what’s going on, but not indefinitely. It depends.
You seem to ignore requests to engage with more consideration of the other, so why expect the other to listen to you?
2 Likes
You are confusing respect or courtesy and debate. Debate is always fine and welcome if done with courtesy and respect. Otherwise, it’s just noise.
I always find it better to say hello as opposed to just punching somebody on the nose to get attention.
tl;dr Courtesy is not earned. It’s implicitly expected. Respect is something we should all also expect by default.
Disrespect is something you earn, should you wish to follow that path.
7 Likes
@happybeing I don’t see relation of your answer to my question.
Most likely, sense of my message lost during translation once again.
What I ask - if people here on forum should show respect only to other people here on forum or to every other person in the world too.
1 Like
Debate can be split into facts and emotions.
It is wrong to say that facts are noise when they come with inappropriate emotional “metadata”.
I don’t think you understand at all, but then you quote something and answer a different point, which makes me believe you very much understand the language to the point where you are trying to teach or misrepresent native speakers!
You have made your point well enough for me.
1 Like
I think I have answered that question 
2 Likes
@happybeing maybe example will make things clear:
If some person on forum will show disrespect to terrorists, for example, (which are not users of this forum), will it violate requirements of this forum to be respectful or not?
@dirvine looks like partial understanding. In both ways. It is very hard to learn language perfectly.
It is surprising because usually I have no problems with it (I understand people and people understand me), but, most likely, my experience with English is more related to technical topics, while having problems in social topics.
1 Like